One reader to our Guys Into CMNM blog wrote  to ask recently:  (That's you, Allen. Thanks).

I thought there might be others here on Tribe who might also be interested starting or joining a local Clothed Male / Naked Male group in your local area.  See our blog at: http://guysn2cmnm.blogspot.com Question:  I wanted to see if you had a group of CMNM in northern Indiana for me to join? Any ideas and/or contacts I could make to join in the area? Thanks. Answer:   So.. what do you do when you live in a rural area or far away from a metropolitan area? Are there any local groups and if not, what you do to get one started? (Answered by 'sunbuns', Kelly Lewis, editor and admin, Guys Into CMNM blog and social networks).

While they may be members of one of our several social networking (online) groups who live the your area, Northern Indiana (or southern Mich or northwestern Ohio),  I don't think there are any real (off-line) CMNM meetings or events -- at least not yet.

CMNM hasn't been recognized for very long and it's still not commonly understood - even by the very men (particularly gay men) who are so turned on by it.  There are elements of it in so many activities / situations that are NOT simply sexual by definition. For example, there may be a men's nudist group in your area or close by. While many don't advocate sexual behavior at their events, some don't prohibit certain types of opportunities where naked and clothed men can intermingle. Another form of CMNM often occurs in certain male sports or fitness situations - joining a YMCA, or other type of fitness club, or amateur sports league often gives a guy (CM or NM) a chance to interact with other males in clothed or naked situations.  Obviously, there may not be any overt sexual behavior but it can nevertheless be highly stimulating.

  For overt sexual situations, you can try a gay baths/sauna. I think Toledo has at least one, and there are certainly some in a few of the major cities around you; likewise a few gay bars have events where nudity (or semi-nudity) is condoned, or even where it is encouraged in backrooms, or enclosed patios, etc. Of course, you can try to start a group -- or at least - hold a CMNM event in your area.  I have lots of ideas and would do as much as possible to help promote in on our blogs, and social networks, etc.  Depending on when it's held, I might be able to attend or organize/host part of it (I'll be traveling in North America from August 1 - 30 -from Hawaii to New York, from San Franciso, California to Provincetown, MA).

One way to start is to make your interest known by joining one (or all) of our Guys Into CMNM social networks. You may want to use a separate email address (since your real identity may expose you to some unwanted noisiness or scrutiny). However, in today's world, it has become less of a problem publicly admitting that one is gay. However, homophobes and morally self-righteous extremists still exist (and may actually be thriving).

It's probably obvious but it will take some initiative and some effort on the part of at least one person to get such an event or group started. However, even one is not enough.  Therefore, you have to try to encourage or attract guys to actually participate FIRST as people  -- not as sexual objects.  If you try to 'round up' a bunch of hunks for your own private orgy, it's not going to work unless you look like a male fashion model and have the body of an Olympic athlete.   To be realistic, most guys into CMNM are just regular guys. The guy down the street or the one who works at the mall or in local office building. What's it going to take to get them to come up with the courage to attend a CMNM event. My advice for guys trying to get a group started is to first make it a fully clothed gathering to initially.

Then a part of the group's activity can be to do something that involves nudity for a fairly short and non-threatening, fun activity - such as ask (or hire) a nude model for some sketching of the naked

male form. Or watch a movie where male nudity is a recurring theme or important point in the plot. Hold a pool party  or barn dance,  play badminton or horseshoes, and allow some of the participants to disrobe.   Set up a fashion night or a costume party in which the 'models' strip for a certain 'runway' event or make it a fund-raiser for charity by letting the audience bid for removal of each piece of clothing for some 'lucky' or willing volunteer who, thereby, gets stripped.    Sexual behavior (penetrative anal or oral) does not have to be involved - especially when the group's members are just meeting for the first time. If there are sparks, then it's better that things develop slowly so that everyone knows the boundaries and feels comfortable acting within them before starting any more 'aggressive' types of CMNM behaviors or situations, especially those involving domination or humiliation or mild bondage.

It's not easy but it can be done.  It's just not going to happen over night and the key to first find a couple of others who are interested and also willing to be patient with the slow development of the

group.  Most guys who are turned on my other men sexually just want to jump to the wild orgy -- and that's NOT going to happen in most cases.  If you want sex with strangers, then use Craig's List or go to a gay sex club, or travel to where there is one. I know I've gone long to answer, but it was a good question, and one whose answer I can attempt to make an appropriate blog entry.   Good luck and let me know how I might be able to help out. Greetings, Kelly Lewis,   - editor and admin, Guys Into CMNM blog and social networks --------------------------

VISIT these sites below:

http://guysn2cmnm.blogspot.com ( Our blog which also links to CMNM groups) http://www.pridesites.com/sunbuns/      (This is a mishmash of different sites and tools that, in effect, works much the        same way as a single integrated social network does). https://www.facebook.com/guysn2cmnm     (You need to be logged into Facebook before you can find this one.)

http://cmnm.groupsite.com/        (A simple but still working Guys Into CMNM social network site) http://cel.ly/c/guysn2cmnm    (An experimental social networking site that works across multiple devices: PC, iPad, iPhone, etc).

Is wrestling - especially naked with your buddy or team mate a type of CMNM behavior that is for male bonding, homoeroticism, or just guys being athletic?

For me, thinking of nude wrestling brings back some powerful memories. It never started out as nude wrestling, but it often turned out to become that. A college buddy - who was supposedly str8t and I would always get into a wrestling match after every time we got drunk -- it might be after a Saturday night's college party (we tended to give one or go to one every weekend), or it might be on Sunday afternoon when he and his girlfriend, my dorm mate (we had tiny private rooms) and I played cards and drank wine throughout the afternoon.

Eventually, as we got sotted, he and I would challenge each other to a wrestling match that always started in our underwear (I didn't freeball then like I do now).

The object of the wrestling match often was to tear off the other guy's briefs. Our spectators just cheered us on and it is truly a wonder that I didn't get caught with my a big hardon because I really had a crush on him -- but it was more like I wanted to 'be' him than just be with him sexually. So that's what nude wrestling means to me .. it's kind of homoerotic, but it's about asserting your masculinity or manhood in a strange kind of way and bonding physically with another guy - -whether he's gay or str8t doesn't really matter.

Actually, I can't really say I've ever had the same feelings toward a gay man and haven't actually wrestled a gay man in the nude -- I mean --- sex comes into the picture long before we get around to wrestling. These events happened during my junior-year-abroad in France. Patrice was studying judo at the time so he would usually get the upperhand in our sweaty wrestling matches - so I didn't actually get to pull off his briefs or expose his cock very often -- maybe that's why I kept trying [grin.]When we had a party, I was typically the one who got the drunkest and acted rather strange (I came from a rather puritanical, family)- like taking off some or most of my clothes, or climbing trees and telephone poles. Patrice and his girlfriend were the ones who helped me get back home and I would find myself in my own bed without any clothes on later the night or the next morning.

I always really wondered which one of them enjoyed 'taking care' of Le Petit (as they used to call me).One of the hottest (and nostalgically regretful) memories for me about those wrestling days in university (in France) was the time after one of our more intense wrestling bouts that Patrice told me privately in the dorm kitchen (where his girlfriend and my roomie could not heard) that he wanted to fuck my ass: 'You know what? - I'd fuck you in the ass.' I just joked about it, and replied that there was no way he was going to get my ass, and then passed it off as if it were nothing but I dreamed for years about what would have happened if I had taken him more seriously.

 It scared me because I knew how strongly I was attached to him emotionally and how much physically attractive he was. I had just come out to myself (and to other guy - my dorm mate). Shortly after that incident, our wrestling matches ended - perhaps from our having reached some kind of irrevocable turning point, and also it was about time for me to return home. Another memory was the time that we all went out in early May to the beach (I was studying in Montpellier),

I ended up getting one of the worst sunbuns I've ever had despite it being a partly cloudy spring day -- Patrice and his girlfriend brought me home, took off all my clothes (I was conscious but in great

pain), and rubbed me with burn cream and kept me warm and with plenty of liquids -- if I had not been in so much pain I would have been excited beyond belief to have Patrice rubbing my body-- as it was I was scorched and grimacing in pain - nothing pleasurable about it. I visited him in France years later - he is married, has two children and teaches English in high school. At this point, we've sort of lost contact, but this posting brought back memories of those idyllic days. If you like nude wrestling, frottage, Spartan love and then take a look at the full site (where the pic above is hosted). http://www.heroichomosex.com/

 

For those who are interested, here are our members' memories of youth hostelling, and the joys of naked boys on road or rail trips.

[ Note from Kelly (sunbuns), blog editor: The stories below are from email group exchanges on the YMNA, Young Men's Nudist Association, a Google group.  The longest ones are written by David or atitlan, moderator of the group. I also have written many times about this topic, and find the situations one encounters in hostels to be wonderful ways to get to know people and find out things about oneself in the process. ]

If you wanted to travel when I was a teenager, it was either unaffordable - and lonely - hotel rooms or it was youth hostels, which were cheap and always had people to talk to. I stayed in numerous youth hostels in Britain, Germany, Austria, Italy and Israel. No two were alike. They might be a 16-bedded farmhouse in the middle of nowhere or a huge city building with dorms each holding 100. A hot shower was a luxury only some offered; at other hostels it might be a cold-water morning wash from a basin. There were chores to be done. At one mountain hostel I had to go out and gather wood so in the evening we could huddle around a welcome fire with only gas lanterns to take us to bed.
A real feeling of camaraderie could build up. Strangers became fast friends, particularly if they met up again at another hostel later on. When I was 17, I hitch-hiked up to Scotland and found myself constantly bumping into a handsome dark-haired French lad of the same age. His name was Thierry and he wanted to be a brain surgeon. One evening I persuaded him and a girl to go for a walk in the forest outside our Scottish castle hostel. I still remember the intense look he gave me and the feeling of his hand on my shoulder but we were not alone, nothing happened and we never met again.
I am not sure why you were told all Americans slept nude because that was not my experience of Americans in youth hostels. I slept nude and so did some of the others in the male dorms but most seemed to wear what we in Britain call y-fronts. These did not hide much when it was time to get up, with morning erections producing tent poles. Lying on a bottom bunk, I would find it difficult not to laugh when the top bunk occupant clambered down, his tented underwear only inches from my face. I always preferred the top bunk to sleep naked.......

The oddest thing about the dorms was the casual nudity. Because we as strangers got to know each other so quickly, we would carry on conversations in the dorm. I remember in Italy a young cyclist with a pleasant but not handsome face getting undressed while talking to me, only for this ugly duckling to turn into a swan. He was hiding a spectacular swimmer's muscled physique. He then stood there naked and full-frontal until he had finished what he wanted to tell me.

My most eye-popping experience of youth hostel nudity came when I was backpacking around Israel.  I was staying next to the Dead Sea, alone in a long line of inter-connected communal showers after a sticky day on a bus through the West Bank. Suddenly the shower room was invaded by a dozen American 16 year-olds looking very fit in their white towels. These were quickly discarded and it became clear they were far more dirty than me, covered in mud from a caving expedition. They were full of excited chatter about the events of the day. I was unsure where to look. With difficulty, I averted my gaze and got back to washing myself. Until that is I was aware of three of them crowding around and almost touching me. Please could I tell them how to turn the showers on, they had never seen a faucet like these. So I had to give them a demonstration. A testing time!

The attached pictures try to convey some of this. A few of the hostels could be old and basic, like the first photo, others might be more comfortable like the second.



The third image illustrates the camaaderie. The fourth an impression of what it was like huddled together in those open showers. atitlan

On Wed, 13 Apr 2011 22:03 +0200, "Fred Stein" <fredstein3@hotmail.com> wrote:
Bring back happy memories. I was very young in the early 70´s - before the interail - lifting around Europe - living in Youth Hostels! In a way when the world still was innocent for a young man. Think of some stories but probably a bit off-topic - f.i. how I was taught that all Americans sleep nude (at the Youth Hostel in Hannover) .... I would love to hear stories from your days meeting guys a bit more simple as today...
Sorry for my English - not my native language ....

  Same experience here, Atitlan. I traveled much of Europe via International Youth Hostel Association. In more cases than not, the hostels were reasonably modern with large dorm areas -- a dozen or more sleeping areas in a room. Even those which were older, and re-structured from former usages (large homes, etc.) had shared accommodation with "total strangers". Nudity -- and by that, I mean, non-sexual and comfortable nudity -- was common: changing clothing, sleeping, showering and traveling to-from the showers. Conversations like, "I have 60 Swedish kroner. They're worth just a little more than a French franc. I'm leaving early in the morning on the ferry and won't be able to get to a bank. Do you have enough francs to exchange for me?" were conducted nude, and the exchange made.
Admittedly, this was in the 1960's and 70's. It was definitely a "different time" from today's common "shame in nudity".
Alic

---------- Another Forwarded response to the above messages ----------

Well, thank you Fred! For those who are interested, here is my memory of youth hostelling. If you wanted to travel when I was a teenager, it was either unaffordable - and lonely - hotel rooms or it was youth hostels, which were cheap and always had people to talk to. I stayed in numerous youth hostels in Britain, Germany, Austria, Italy and Israel. No two were alike. They might be a 16-bedded farmhouse in the middle of nowhere or a huge city building with dorms each holding 100. A hot shower was a luxury only some offered; at other hostels it might be a cold-water morning wash from a basin. There were chores to be done. At one mountain hostel I had to go out and gather wood so in the evening we could huddle around a welcome fire with only gas lanterns to take us to bed.

A real feeling of camaraderie could build up. Strangers became fast friends, particularly if they met up again at another hostel later on. When I was 17, I hitch-hiked up to Scotland and found myself constantly bumping into a handsome dark-haired French lad of the same age. His name was Thierry and he wanted to be a brain surgeon. One evening I persuaded him and a girl to go for a walk in the forest outside our Scottish castle hostel. I still remember the intense look he gave me and the feeling of his hand on my shoulder but we were not alone, nothing happened and we never met again.

I am not sure why you were told all Americans slept nude because that was not my experience of Americans in youth hostels. I slept nude and so did some of the others in the male dorms but most seemed to wear what we in Britain call y-fronts. These did not hide much when it was time to get up, with morning erections producing tent poles. Lying on a bottom bunk, I would find it difficult not to laugh when the top bunk occupant clambered down, his tented underwear only inches from my face. I always preferred the top bunk to sleep naked.......



The oddest thing about the dorms was the casual nudity. Because we as strangers got to know each other so quickly, we would carry on conversations in the dorm. I remember in Italy a young cyclist with a pleasant but not handsome face getting undressed while talking to me, only for this ugly duckling to turn into a swan. He was hiding a spectacular swimmer's muscled physique. He then stood there naked and full-frontal until he had finished what he wanted to tell me.

My most eye-popping experience of youth hostel nudity came when I was backpacking around Israel. I was staying next to the Dead Sea, alone in a long line of inter-connected communal showers after a sticky day on a bus through the West Bank. Suddenly the shower room was invaded by a dozen American 16 year-olds looking very fit in their white towels. These were quickly discarded and it became clear they were far more dirty than me, covered in mud from a caving expedition. They were full of excited chatter about the events of the day. I was unsure where to look. With difficulty, I averted my gaze and got back to washing myself. Until that is I was aware of three of them crowding around and almost touching me. Please could I tell them how to turn the showers on, they had never seen a faucet like these. So I had to give them a demonstration. A testing time!  [The photo above is one this blog's author.]

The attached pictures try to convey some of this. A few of the hostels could be old and basic, like the first photo, others might be more comfortable like the second. The third image illustrates the camaraderie. The fourth an impression of what it was like huddled together in those open showers.
Stay bare
atitlan